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How to Find the Right Home for Spouses With Different Wants

One type of transaction where realtors really get to use their skills are with families that need to get on the same page. When realtors first meet with clients to discuss what their needs are, it's common to see that they have conflicting wants. Realtors need to find common ground before moving forward.

Realtors should practice staying impartial. The key to success is understanding both parties and then guiding them to an agreement which fulfills everyone's goals. The following are steps on how to approach the situation:

  1. Sit down both parties and find out what they already agree on as a need versus a want.

  2. Be careful not to take sides. Be neutral.

  3. Ask both which aspects they are willing to compromise.

  4. Be ready with facts. Learn statistics, market conditions, forecasts, and any information you find useful to make a point.

  5. To compromise, the realtor needs to both push and pull. If there is truly a disagreement, no one will agree to back down unless they think the other party has caved in. Ask questions that help them think and conclude that they aren't the sole decision maker and they can't have everything they want. This ultimately opens people's minds to the alternative route they need to take because of their behavior.

  6. Picking the right home is often times not getting the perfect home. Realtors need to understand up front what the person's motivations are. This information can help later on with conflicting opinions. It gives you an opportunity to go back and recall their statements before the conflict.

For example, If they are disagreeing on location, the relator can remind them when they first met and agreed living in a particular school district as long as they found something priced well. If they are disagreeing on money, the relator can remind them that the home has all of the criteria they identified when they first met.


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